Popular culture has often labelled the woman as the more complex partner. References are often made about how it is difficult to understand what’s on a woman’s mind. This may be true when it comes to deciding on what she wants on her birthday or if she really is alright with you going out to get drunk with male friends. But the truth of the matter is that by and large, most women are open about a relationship and its future. They’re always open to discussions and find it easier to talk about their feelings. Unfortunately, most men, however serious, are at the other end of the spectrum and not as transparent about their feelings and intentions. So, how do you tell if the man is truly serious about you? Fortunately, there are certain signs that could be used to decode the man’s behaviour.
1. He doesn’t play mind games with you
If he says he will drop in to see you, he does. When he makes plans with you for the weekend, he sticks to them. He doesn’t torment you by saying one thing and doing something else. He’s not cold one instant and warm and affectionate the other. If his ex-girlfriend calls him, he tells you about it for the sake of honesty and not in a way that makes you uncomfortable. When a man plays mind games, it’s typically because he doesn’t really care, or because the relationship is casual for him. If your man makes a special effort to be honest and open, that’s a sign of his commitment to the relationship.
2. He wants to know things about you
And it’s not just the regular stuff like “What are your hopes and dreams?” or, “What inspires you to paint?” or “What’s your favourite rock band?” He asks you questions about your childhood, your job, parents, etc. He wants to know what it was like to be the elder sister or, he always asks you how you cope with your long stressful work hours. He is genuinely concerned about your career and asks you about your plans. Even the best actor cannot feign an interest in mundane details such as, “What time did you wake up today?”. or “Did you get enough sleep last night?” If he’s serious about you, he will find all the mundane details interesting.
3. He calls you multiple times everyday
He calls you sometimes for no reason. Even if you’ve met at a coffee shop an hour ago, he calls you after he reaches home, or from the elevator. This behaviour is typically displayed in the first few weeks of the relationship, when everything is new and exciting. However, when you realize that he still calls you just to hear your voice and it’s been about a year since you started going out, you should know that he’s serious about you.
4. If he’s always punctual…
If he’s always punctual, he’s definitely into you. When a man is serious about his girlfriend, he will ensure that she doesn’t have to wait for an hour at the bus stop. He says he will pick you up for dinner and 8 p.m. and calls around 7.55 p.m. to tell you he’s stuck in traffic and will be 15 minutes late, he’s respectful of your feelings. He won’t ever have you hanging around the park for half an hour before he shows up. Most girls constantly find themselves waiting for their boyfriend’s phone call, or for him to pick them up. If you don’t find yourself in that position, you’ve got yourself a winner.
5. When he listens to you talk
Several girls complain that they can’t talk to their boyfriends and that they just don’t listen. When you spend time with him, he really listens to you. He’s all ears about your problems at work. On the train, he’s not distracted by fellow passengers, but is listening to you intently. You have long chats on the phone where he hangs on to every word you say. You find yourself telling him things that you’ve never told any boyfriend before. He’s not constantly checking his cell phone for messages, when you talk about the day. If your man remembers that it’s your aunt’s birthday in a couple of weeks, just because you mentioned it in passing, understand that he’s listening to every word you’re saying.
6. When he wants to date you exclusively
You’re his steady girlfriend and he makes sure everyone knows it. He is faithful and expects fidelity from you too. He has had the conversation about being exclusive with you. He makes sure everyone knows that he’s your boyfriend, not only because he doesn’t want random men hitting on you, but because he wants to send a clear signal to all the girls that he’s taken. This is a big step and you should appreciate him for this.
7. He’s transparent about his routine
You know his routine and what his day holds for him, not because you’re a tyrant but because he volunteers this information. You know he’s in the gym in the morning and reaches work at 10 a.m., after making a quick dash to a coffee shop. You know that if he doesn’t take your call in the afternoon, he’s probably in a meeting or in the loo. If he’s missing for a couple of hours, there’s always an explanation that’s credible. You have never wondered, “What could he possibly be doing now?” or “Why hasn’t he called me?”.
8. He introduces you to his friends
He is keen that you meet his friends and not only because he wants to show off what a knockout you are, but because he’s so in love with you. He wants his friends to know you and like you. He wants you to get comfortable with them, because this paves the way for your initiation in the group. He makes an effort to be nice to your friends for the same reasons. He wants you to meet his family. This move is not to be underestimated at all. If there’s one thing common in men across continents, it’s the fact that they only take the girl home, if they’re taking the relationship to the next level.
9. He asks for your opinion and respects it
He wants you to accompany him while he shops for clothes, because he trusts your choice. When he’s confused about his career, he talks to you and listens patiently to what you have to say. He discusses things with you to seek your opinion.
10. He’s always there when you need him
He may be foul tempered and may say hurtful things from time to time, but he’s always there when you need him. When your uncle passed away, he was there to hold your hand. When you lost a job, he took you out for ice cream and reassured you. He may have his faults, but if he really cares for you, he will always try to protect you. If a bitchy girlfriend keeps picking on you, he calls her bluff and shuts her up. If he genuinely worries about you because you have cramps during that time of the month, he’s definitely serious about you.